what am i proud of today?

welcome to introspection ft. harsehaj! ⭐️ i’m harsehaj, an 18 y/o always up to something in social good x tech.

this publication is a place for me to reflect on a new topic daily, and send it to your inbox. if you’re new here, sign up to tune in! you reading this is keeping me accountable, so thank you for that. as a treat, i drop cool resources/opportunities at the end. 💌 

btw, feel free to reply with topic ideas you want me to write about for future posts.

onto today’s topic: what am i proud of today? ⚔️

growing up, i believed that asking for help was a sign of weakness.

if i couldn’t understand something or needed help, asking someone was my last resort. i hated admitting i didn’t know something.

i would turn youtube tutorials and my google search history inside out in hopes of getting an answer. if i couldn’t find it, i would just give up on the question instead of asking someone, even my parents.

i think this mentality developed because i could see right from the beginning in school that i had to overcompensate to make up for a gender gap instilled by society. being a girl, i thought there was no way i could show any weakness. i had to be tough and resilient or else i wouldn’t be seen as an equal. ⚖️

even if spraining my ankle on the soccer field was painful and i wanted to sit out, i sucked it up and kept playing. i hated feeling weak. it’s funny now that i think about it, because top soccer players literally sob and roll around the field in pain even if they trip over their own feet.

today, i’m proud that i have started to let this go. i can’t say that i have completely, but i’m no longer stopping myself to pursue uncertainty with the help of others.

it has only been possible because i’ve gotten to know so many inspirational, loving & kind women over the past 2 years. 💟 they’ve shown me that being vulnerable isn’t weak, it’s healthy and crucial to grow. i’ve learned that i can only make progress if i accept failure with grace, and seek help when i need it.

there is so much to learn from other people, and often times, they’re more than thrilled to share their knowledge and guidance with you. i’m proud today that i’m asking questions, seeking help and diving into uncertainty, even if i don’t know all the answers or have a perfect path laid out for me.

yes, societal gaps exist, but i don’t need to center my mindset around bridging them. instead, it will naturally happen when i continue making progress in areas i actually care about.

questions lead to conversations, and conversations lead to friendships. i have made so many of these friendships because i have let go of this “not knowing is weakness” mentality, and i’m so proud of myself for it.

what are you proud of today?

cool finds of the day 🔍️