my gap year

welcome to introspection ft. harsehaj! ⭐️ i’m harsehaj, a 19 y/o always up to something in social good x tech.

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onto today’s topic: my gap year 🌏️ 

this year i learned more than i ever possibly could have if i were in a classroom.

for all the lessons, experiences, and memories, i’m eternally grateful. i know these stories will be as everlasting as my gratitude. i’ve learned about the world and how big it is, yet i’ve never felt more confident in my abilities to take it on.

genuinely, it feel like a fire of drive, joy, and wonder has been lit in me once again.

“life was so good as a kid.” yeah, but wow, life is so good right now. it’s hard to put into words the sense of revitalization this year has evoked in me, but this tiktok resonated and made my heart swell.

why a gap year? 🛫 

in february 2023, i had never once considered the option of taking a gap year. in july 2023, i boarded my first flight (of many) for the year.

the opportunity to take a funded gap year was first introduced to me by morehead-cain’s scholarship offer, which greatly piqued my interest. i spent a lot of time debating back and forth mentally regarding whether or not i should take this opportunity on.

the significant inflection point was when i finally sat down and wrote my big intentions for this gap year:

1. enrich my mind through mental and physical challenges.

2. build a toolbox for entrepreneurial success (network, professional experience & learning to figure things out).

3. improve upon character and grow a deeper appreciation for life.

whenever i recount my gap year to a new person, i most commonly hear, “wow you really made the most of it.” i truly believe i did as well, and that’s because i was purposeful about it. i dove into this year with a vision, even if it wasn’t super concrete or planned to the exact details before i embarked on it. 

that intentionality was a key reason why my gap year was so productive and formative. 🧩 gap years that lack this piece play into the stigma. people assume ‘gappers’ are lazy, unmotivated and clueless — i’d argue the exact opposite for my gap year. i did so much that nourished my mind, body, and spirit. 

it’s okay to not know what you want to do in life. it’s not okay to let time pass without exploring what’s out there or without being intentional about your rest. the key to happiness doesn’t drop into your lap out of nowhere. the same way you probably stick to a goal in education, it’s important to identify a ‘why?’ with a gap year too.

i’ve written posts summarizing many of my difference trips/experiences from this year, but i’ll outline the full map now. 

my gap map (~14 months // july 2023 - august 2024) 🌏️ 

full posts detailing most trips are linked in the titles, and of course, all the photos are on my instagram. :)

🇮🇹🇨🇭🇫🇷 italy, switzerland & france • july 2023

• right after graduating high school, i was whisked away to a long-awaited family trip to some of europe. this was my family’s first international trip ever, and it honestly filled me with a lot of pride for my parents. how far they’ve come that they can take their kids and themselves to europe for the first time. they’ve accomplished everything they aimed for when immigrating to canada + so much more. 

• we spent 3 weeks (~1 week per country) exploring italy, switzerland & paris specifically. i really wanted this time to spend with my family as much as possible. 

• highlights: the delicious food, a rainy day in lucerne, & mountains!

• logistics: my parents funded this trip & my dad did all the planning. :)

🇺🇸 explore fellowship in nyc & connecticut • august 2023

• i spent a week in connecticut learning about effective altruism and getting to know 50+ other fellows. i wanted a good transitional experience into autonomy and tech-focused learning, and this fellowship was a perfect fit. a quote that stuck with me: “life is sweet, love is free, and we all live in abundance.”

• highlights: the people, philosophical discussion, & tomfoolery.

• logistics: the explore fellowship funded everything (flights, accommodation & food). 

🇺🇸 san francisco / bay area • september - december 2023

• my fall ‘semester’ was spent in a hacker house in the bay area, california where i built an ai fashion assistant as a part of the residency’s founding cohort and immersed myself fully in the tech ecosystem that san francisco boasts. i wrote this post before boarding my flight to sfo. :) 

• highlights: being part of the buildspace, residency & founders inc. communities, all the friends i made, concerts & going skydiving 

• logistics: i planned these 3 months by myself and funded it through a grant from emergent ventures. 

🇹🇿 tanzania •  jan 2024 

• as per annual tradition for morehead-cain gappers, myself alongside 10 friends spent a month in tanzania hiking mount kilimanjaro, taking on a safari in the serengeti, and exploring zanzibar. i was eager for the physical challenge and learned a lot as a result.

• highlights: summiting kilimanjaro, celebrating my 19th birthday, and seeing animals in the wild. 

• logistics: huge kudos to sachi for planning a lot of this trip and morehead-cain for funding all of it. 

🇰🇷 south korea • february 2024

• korea was my very first real solo trip. i wanted to challenge myself to find excitement in exploring the unfamiliar. it may have worked a little too well because i absolutely adore being solo and venturing into the unknown now. it was a chance for me to learn a lot about myself and another culture.

• highlights: making friends from complete strangers, thrill of solo, café hopping, and snowy day in seoul.

• logistics: i planned everything from housing & transportation by myself with funding from morehead-cain.

🇹🇭 thailand • february 2024

• my experiences, planning, and intentions across south korea, thailand and later vietnam were all very similar: becoming comfortable being fully autonomous and solo. thailand specifically was centred around appreciating the present and slowing down.

• highlights: motorbikes, the freedom to explore, and the sunsets.

• logistics: i planned everything from housing & transportation by myself with funding from morehead-cain.

🇻🇳 vietnam • march 2024

• my biggest motivation for including vietnam in my travels was to take on the ha giang motorbiking loop. i wanted to learn about the culture, natural beauty, and problem-solving (which we know i had to do a lot of …).

• highlights: messing up, mountains, and pho.

• logistics: i did the loop with an agency (qt motorbikes) and funded everything myself through an external grant.

🇮🇳 india • march 2024

• i personally had no intentions for india because my family was practically dragging me along. 😭 my family and i hadn’t been to india in over 10 years, so it was a long overdue trip to see our relatives.

• highlights: celebrating my sister’s birthday, seeing my maternal family, and the food.

• logistics: my parents planned and funded this 2-week trip entirely excluding flights which i financed through an external grant.

🇯🇵 japan • march-may 2024

• japan was one of the 3 aspects i was dead set on before starting my gap year because i was eager to combine service with adventure. i wanted to do some sort of work-stay and immerse myself in another lifestyle. i was both solo and with friends in japan.

• highlights: the tea farm i interned at, hiking the kumano kodo, and feeling like a kid but still so powerfully autonomous.

• logistics: i planned the entirety of the 2 months by myself and funded it largely through an external grant. my housing and food was provided for me by the tea farm while i worked there.

🇺🇸 sailing in maine • july-august 2024

• 3 weeks at sea wasn’t by choice, but a requirement by the same scholarship that funded my whole gap year. although i had to do it, i wanted to take this time to really let this entire year sink in and reflect on how i’ve grown. i actually planned out this whole post and some of the content while i was on the boat. it was a year of doing so much, so these 3 weeks of having no external stimuli was crucial in allowing me to extract as much value as possible from the year.

• highlights: beach days, rock climbing, and my ‘solo’ experience

• logistics: morehead-cain funded this entire experience, and outward bound facilitated the programming.

frequent asks 📝 

what were all of your favourites?

i wrote a post on all my travel superlatives here (best food, most memorable, friendliest people etc.).

most impactful experience?

naming just one is a tough ask. i can’t deny that one particular experience comes to mind immediately though. the 3 weeks i spent interning on a tea farm in rural japan was one of the most meaningful experiences of my life.

my instinct when I think of “impactful” experiences is to recall the huge milestones – summiting kilimanjaro, speaking on stage at conferences or hiking japan’s ancient pilgrimage trails. however, when i reflect deeply on the inflection points of my mindset, i recognize that the floodgates for a newfound patience, acceptance that life isn’t about the endless hustle, and enjoyment for the present truly solidified when i was picking weeds out of green tea bushes with a view of pink cherry blossom clusters sprinkled across setoya’s mountainous landscape.

i was transported to a new life, and that in and of itself triggered the realization that my life isn’t fixed. i don’t need to be a tech-obsessed hustler. nor do i have to be a traveling nomad 24/7. i really can be everything and anything i dream of, all at once. i believe many of us lose that ambition as we grow older. the magical tea farm ignited this fire for life and its possibilities once more.

it was also one of my very last experiences, so it’s also helpful that all of my learnings from the year accumulated and i had time to process my growth.

how did you finance everything?

i briefly mentioned finances/logistics for each part of the trip in this post, but i have a more detailed explanation here.

packing recommendations / tips?

i will be making a separate post some time soon that’s more focused on my tips, advice and general recommendations — more like a how to gap year post. :)

areas of growth 🌱 

as the days pass now that this year is officially over, i continue to observe just how much i’ve changed. i managed to categorize this growth into 5 big buckets. i notice myself pulling from different experiences from this year as i think through problems, develop conclusions and ideas, and push myself past limits. each day from this year was indeed a point of growth in some sort of way.

the fact that i can vividly remember nearly every single day from the past 14 months should be enough of a testament to this.

becoming more resilient 💪 

patience was the largest bucket of improvement i wanted to improve upon before starting my gap year. now i realize that not only has my temperament mellowed out, but i’ve also become a more generally positive person, and i extend that energy both inwardly and outwardly. the root cause for this chance is that i’ve become much more resilient — to failure, to negativity, and to everything i can’t control.

if something goes wrong, i no longer panic or stress much. i think back to the huge setbacks i’ve had (re: vietnam …) and how i was able to power through them. the small obstacle in front of me suddenly seems so insignificant, and the little annoyances don’t build up anymore either – i let them pass and i feel more at peace.

being joyfully present ☀️ 

i’ve grown to enjoy what’s right in front of my eyes. i’m a major victim to over-planning tendencies and the nagging need to always be looking towards the future. the unreal beauty of every place i visited helped me appreciate the value of everything around me in the present. now, i make it a point to look straight ahead at what’s in front of me rather than keeping my head down, watching for rocks i may or may not trip over.

why worry for the future and discard the fleeting joy of the present? you can set goals and acknowledge your current progress at the same time — they aren’t mutually exclusive. sometimes it feels like life is a never ending climb of reaching more and more success, but i’ve realized that my current present is what 7 year old me would have deemed unobtainable. i should honour that by being joyfully present.

bias towards action ⚡️ 

why wait? if there’s something i want to do or achieve, the only time to start is now. there’s little value in waiting to live or accomplish something. try now, even if it means failing. i’ve found myself waiting for the “right time” less now.

i wrote about this specific learning a lot more in my post recapping 3 months spent in san francisco.

loving being solo 🧘‍♀️ 

while you wait for someone, the whole world waits for you. i grew up hating being alone, and i wrote that post right before starting my gap year. reading it now, i can confidently say that i genuinely do gain energy from being alone and thrive while exploring independently.

fomo doesn’t get me down so much, i’ve grown more comfortable setting boundaries and speaking my mind, and ensure that i feed my soul — all because i decided i would hop on a flight to seoul, south korea solo. :)

heightened ambition 🏆️ 

i already mentioned this previously, but seeing what the world has to offer in turn helped me internalize that my life can also have unlimited possibilities. there’s no need for me to restrict myself to a box. i want to achieve so much. i can do that, and i will.

i don’t see my gap year as an ending point for this “arc” but rather a starting point for a foundational theme and vision for the life ahead of me.

me 1 year ago 🐣 

the last time i thought to myself, “wow, today sucked” was 14 months ago. not just because i’ve clearly been doing very exciting things every single day, but because i no longer let the things i can’t control, control me. i certainly wasn’t doing exciting things while on a 30-foot pulling boat in maine, yet i still didn’t end a single day feeling miserable about how it went.

there’s something to smile about in every day, and it’s up to me to make that happen. it only took me 39 flights and 10 different countries to true embody this lesson … 😅 

“don’t let her take a gap year.” 🔪 

convincing my parents to be on board with me taking a gap year was definitely a struggle, but i knew it was necessary. i wouldn’t have enjoyed this year in the slightest if my parents didn’t support it.

their biggest concern echoed by the other parents they spoke to was, “she’ll never want to return to school.” my parents immigrated to canada for better opportunities in education and employment for their children, so i completely understood their perspective, but i also knew myself well.

their concern ended up being half-wrong, half-right. 😁 i don’t want to go to school for the same reason anymore. before, it felt like a required stepping stone to achieve success. it seemed like an obligation. now, i’m going because i want to keep growing, meet more people, and live this once-in-a-lifetime experience to its fullest. college only comes around once. i’m more excited than i would have been without this year.

mom and dad, thank you for your relentless support and holding my big dreams for life so high in your eyes. when others questioned your decision in letting me take a gap year, you simply shook your head and said “she knows what she’s doing,” and i’m endlessly grateful for your trust in me.

there’s little anyone can accomplish without a support system, and i’m so blessed to have parents that are able to grow past generational stigmas, and take that leap of faith.

my parents have made that leap of faith as well when they first stepped foot on canadian soil. they know firsthand how challenging instability and change is. as a parent, it’s scary to knowingly let your child do the same thing and allow themself the option of failure. it’s hard to watch.

i’ve done hard things, but wow my parents have climbed mountains with obstacles i’ll never have to worry about. i thank them for letting me dare to dream, to fail, to try, and to truly pursue joyful fulfillment.

nothing would have been possible without them, and i mean that from the bottom of my heart.

back to “reality?” 🤨 

without a doubt, the past 14 months have shown me the real “real world.” maybe i didn’t learn calc 2, but i sure as hell did learn how to develop ai-powered apps, how to summit mountains, and what it means to actually bring my ideas and ambitions into fruition.

now that i’ve returned to what society has dubbed “reality,” this passage in particular resonates with me. here’s an excerpt:

this line specifically — i remember: never give up what has happened to you.

i know what life has to offer. that newfound hope and confidence is so powerful. i’ll never give it up. :)

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